nostalgic at 34. That is usually a time for intense experiences, life is supposed to be happening at 34. But since there is nothing normal about me, I've realized lately how bitterly nostalgic I've turned lately. I yearn and long for a lot of firsts...first touch, first emotion, the very first real life experience...
I even miss the first day at school. The smell of books and the itchy pantyhose my mom had given me, the cheap flowers I was supposed to give to the teacher, the first ink stains on my fingers and the red scrunchie worn by the mean freckled girl who stepped on my new shoes.
It's been 28 years since that day and, yet, I can still taste the biscuits my mom had packed me for lunch. But mostly I am nostalgic about ..the state of being in love
I am also nostalgic about new beginnings, breathtaking conversations, reasons to laugh so hard til I tear, or the irresistible longing to be kissed.
I nostalgically find myself at 34, with so many unreasonable dreams, too much passion, not enough reason, just a tolerable dose of good sense and a whole lot of fervent enthusiasm. So far..